The Three Little Tendos
by Bunny4
Summary: A Ranma 1/2 version of the three little pigs.....


The Three Little Tendos  
  
By: Bunny  
  
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Ranma 1/2!! DUH!! I'm just screwing with the story for a cure   
for my boredom...  
  
  
Authoress's note: Yes, yes, I know. A three little pigs version on Ranma 1/2. Hey, why   
NOT??  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
Narrator: Once upon a time there were three little Tendos. Thier names were Akane, Nabiki   
and Kasumi.   
  
Nabiki: I'm sick of this... let's move out!!  
  
Akane: YEAH!!  
  
Kasumi: But what about father?  
  
Narrator: You see, the three Tendo's father was a bit...... overprotective.....  
  
Soun: NOOOOO!!! MY LITTLE GIRLS ARE GOING TO LEAVE ME ALL ALONE!!!!   
WAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! *runs around the room crying hysterically*  
  
Narrator: *coughs* SO, the three little Tendos promised that they would return as soon as   
they built themselves a comfy little home each, and no they wouldn't actually live there,   
they just wanted to work thier asses off because they felt like it, and-- *doorbell sound*   
OOOO my Dominoe's pizza is here!!! Later girls!!  
  
Akane: HEY!!! you can't just leave--!!!!  
  
Kasumi: He left....  
  
Nabiki: We need someone to be narrator!!!!  
  
Akane: *snaps fingers* OF COURSE!! I'll be right back. *she zips off and returns with a   
very disgruntled Ranma-kun*  
  
Ranma: Whaddaya want NOW Akane?  
  
Akane: You have to be narrator for our story! BAKA! *whaps him on the head with a pan*  
  
Ranma: Why should I?!  
  
Nabiki & Akane: *evil glare*  
  
Ranma: *chastised* okay okay.... *he picks up the script* Ahem, alright, to the three little   
Tendos went off to make thier own houses...  
  
Akane: All I can afford is a whole bunch of straw!! What good will that be??  
  
Nabiki: Well, you can always build a house out of it.....  
  
Akane: Huh? Hey, you know, you're right!!  
  
Ranma: So Akane, the youngest Tendo, being dumb and gullible, took the straw and built   
herself a straw house--  
  
Akane: *whaps Ranma on the head w/ a pan* BAKA!!!  
  
Ranma: Heeeey, I'm just reading what it says on the script!!  
  
Nabiki: *leans over Ranma's shoulder and reads* Hey, he's right Akane, it DOES say   
you're dumb and gullible in the script...  
  
Akane: WHAT??? WHO WROTE THE SCRIPT???!!!!  
  
Bunny: *mysteriously appears in a puff of smoke* I did, and if you don't watch what   
you say I'll let you get eaten by the Big Bad Pervert!  
  
All: The WHAT??!!  
  
Bunny: The Big Bad Pervert!! Refer to Page 1 of the script, which has all the cast roles....  
  
All: *looks at casting sheet*   
  
All: ......  
  
Akane: So...the Big Bad pervert is actually the Big Bad Wolf?  
  
Bunny: Bingo. *vanishes in a puff of logic*  
  
Ranma: Ahem. Anyways, the eldest Tendo, Kasumi, had the sense to buy something   
heavy to build her house, but the really big problem was that she was dirt poor. So she   
ended up building her house of of sticks.  
  
Kasumi: How mean...  
  
Nabiki: I TOLD you not to buy the coffee for daddy, but do you listen to me?   
Nooooo......  
  
Ranma: and the middle Tendo, Nabiki, who not only had a head on her shoulders but   
tons of money from selling perverted pictures of Ran-chan and Akane to the Big Bad   
Pervert, build herself a brick house--- NABIKI!!!! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SOLD   
THOSE PICTURES!!!!!  
  
Akane: NABIKI!!!  
  
Nabiki: Uh-oh.... *locks herself inside her brick house*  
  
Akane and Kasumi: *walk sullenly to thier own houses*  
  
Ranma: After the Three Tendos were settled in thier respective houses, up snuck the   
Big Bad Pervert....  
  
Kuno: This is RIDICULOUS!!! I mean, there must be some other way to get my   
dearest Akane and my Pigtailed Goddess back from the wreched sorceror Saotome....  
  
Ranma: *twick* and then the Big Bad Pervert fell off a cliff....  
  
Bunny: *appears and whaps Ranma on the head with a rolling pin* STICK TO THE   
PLOT!!!!!  
  
Ranma: *grumble grumble* So the Big Bad pervert, being stupid, went to the eldest   
Tendo's house...  
  
Kuno: Let me in I say!!! I am Akane's strongest most handsome suitor, and--  
  
Kasumi: Akane's not here right now!  
  
Kuno: You lie!! Now let me in or I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house   
down!! .........WHO WROTE THIS FREAKING SCRIPT!!??  
  
Ranma: So Kuno blew the house of sticks down. Kasumi got up and ran out--  
  
Kasumi: EEEEP!!! KONO HENTAI!!!!!!!  
  
Kuno:........what'd I do.....?  
  
Ranma: And Kasumi, being MUCH smarter than both Akane and The Big Bad   
Pervert, ran to Nabiki's brick house. Kuno, being really stupid, followed Kasumi.  
  
Kuno: Come back!!! *runs after Kasumi*  
  
Nabiki: *sees Kasumi and opens the door* Quick, get inside!  
  
Kasumi: *runs inside Nabiki's house*  
  
Nabiki: *watches as Kuno runs torward the house, and slams the door in his face   
at the last minute*  
  
Kuno: Owww..... *he falls in a crumpled heap on the doorstep*  
  
Ranma: So the Big Bad Pervert tried to blow the house down...  
  
Kuno: I'll huff and I'll puff.... Good God, you can't be serious!!! How can I possibly   
blow down a brick house like that??!!  
  
Ranma: Well, you can always use your imagination....  
  
Kuno: Well, I guess I'll try the chimney then... *Kuno climbs up to the roof*   
*grumbling* Stupid Bunny I'll be sure she pays through her nose for humilliating   
me like this......  
  
Ranma: But of course Nabiki was too smart for him....   
  
Nabiki: *lights a fire in the chimney as Kuno comes down it* Well, you need to   
cool your jets Kuno-baby....  
  
Kuno: *sniffs the air as he crawls down the chimney* Hmm, I smell something   
burning.... *he then notices that his pants are on fire and screams girlishly, shooting   
up the chimney and landing in a heap on the ground a few feet away from the house*  
  
Ranma: The forgetten Youngest Tendo, Akane, who had been watching the whole   
ordeal, came up behind Kuno and doused him with cold water  
  
Akane: .......  
  
Kuno: *looks back and forth between Nabiki's House and Akane in shock* You   
mean....you mean.... I DID ALL THAT FOR NOTHING????!!!!  
  
Ranma: We knew that from the start Kuno....you were doing it for Akane, weren't you?  
  
Akane: *twick* *tosses the rest of the cold water on Ranma*  
  
Ranma-chan: HEY!!!!  
  
Kuno: MY PIGTAILED GODDESS!!! I'VE FOUND YOU AT LAST!!!! *glomps   
onto Ran-chan*  
  
Ranma-chan: Let me go you pervert!!!!!!  
  
Bunny: *appears, catching the script that Ranma dropped* So, the three Tendos   
decided that it was safer to stay with thier Daddy....  
  
Soun: *cries* MY LITTLE GIRLS CAME BACK TO ME!!!!! *hugs them all,   
crying hysterically*  
  
Bunny: And Ran-chan and the Big bad pervert got married.....   
  
Ran-chan: WHAT????!!!!  
  
Bunny: And went off to a remote desert islnad in the carribean and had lots and   
lots of kids, or at least they did until Kuno was killed off by Shampoo and Ukyo,   
and then Ranma was killed off by Ryoga and Mousse, who each got thier respective   
match and everyone else lived happily ever after!!  
  
Ran-chan: NO WAY!!! BUNNY, YOU SICK TWISTED FREAK, THAT'S NOT   
WHAT IT SAYS IN THE SCRIPT!!!!  
  
Bunny: THE END!!  
  
Ran-chan: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!  
  
Kuno: Come on my pigtailed goddess, we have to go get married and have kids,   
like the script says!!!  
  
Ran-chan: SOMEONE SAVE ME!!!!!!  
  
  
THE END~*~*~  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Kuno: *discreetly hands Bunny 100,000,000 yen*  
  
Bunny: *discreetly pockets it*   
  
Kuno: I thank you humbly for accomodating my wishes...  
  
Bunny: Don't mention it... *wink* 


End file.
